View from the Back of the Pack - October and November

by Dave Webb

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK – OCTOBER 2014

If you are planning an outdoor event in October, then I suggest you schedule it for the second Saturday. This is when the Parrett Trail Relay is run, and every year we finish in glorious sunshine in the garden of the Wynyard’s Gap pub. The relay starts at the coast north-west of Bridgwater, then follows the course of the River Parrett, veering away from it in places over a route of about 48 miles. Legs 3 and 4 pass through the areas which dominated last winter’s news programmes, where the river had not been dredged, and the floods would not subside. Our leg 3 runners, Dave Carnell and Victoria Barnett, were late meeting up, and had to drive down a road that was supposedly closed in order to get to the start in time. They then enjoyed an interesting run past a lot of the houses that are being repaired from last winter’s floods, just in time for this winter.

When they were starting to run I received a worried call from Dan Cantrell whose co-runner, Donna Elliott, had been drafted in as a late replacement 2 days before the race. There was no sign of her and he would need to start soon. Dan is notoriously poor at navigation, so we were relying on Donna to show him the way, as well as needing her to run for her team. In the end Dan had to start without her and find his own way. All was going well until he reached a place where the path was closed for the flood works. He claims that he took advice from a local councillor on a bicycle, who told him the closure only applied to vehicles. Dan climbed round the fencing, sidestepped the protesting security guard, and ran off, leaving the councillor and the guard in heated debate. This seems to be a blatant bid to win the club’s annual PR Award, ‘for bringing the club into disrepute’. Donna meanwhile had started 7 minutes after everyone else but then followed the correct route and met up with Dan at the end, where they were both delighted to see Jackie England, who kindly drove them back to their cars, so they did not have to run back past the indignant security guard.

The organisers were disappointed with the number of entries this year so have asked how the event could be improved. My suggestion was that each team should have 2 batons, with a runner starting at each end. The aim would then be to meet somewhere in the middle. This would save time, and add an element of uncertainty, given the risk that runners get lost and fail to meet up. My co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother suggested that they scrap all the running and begin the race in the pub garden. Each team would then have to send a runner to the bar, bring back drinks for all, down the drinks, and then send the next runner, until the whole team had completed the course.

In other news, I forgot to mention last month that the fastest hairdresser in the West won the ‘Super Vet’ prize at the Bridgwater Half Marathon. This does not mean that she has branched out into animal medicine, but instead refers, rather unflatteringly, to her age. At the October Street 5K Maiden Newton Runners won 5 of the categories, which reflects the number of speedy runners now in the club, though I am pleased to say that we also have plenty of slow runners. In fact I was recently reading a PG Wodehouse book, where he describes a butler as being ‘designed for stability not speed’, which would be a good description of many of us in Maiden Newton Runners.

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK – NOVEMBER 2014

Last month I mentioned that the fastest hairdresser in the west had won the ‘Supervet’ category at the Bridgwater Half Marathon. This category reflected her age rather than her skills in animal medicine, but she is a spring chicken compared to some of our members. Talking of chickens, the world’s oldest marathon runner, Fauja Singh, began running after playing the local sport of ‘chase the rooster’. Older readers who want to take up running could also start by playing ‘chase the rooster’, or they could chase any animal of their choice, though I would caution against playing ‘chase the tortoise’ after one of my work colleagues tripped over one of his tortoises, sustaining a nasty injury to his leg (the man’s leg, not the tortoise’s leg, so far as I know the tortoise was startled but unhurt, thanks to its protective shell).

But I digress. The point about mentioning older runners was to celebrate the fantastic achievement of my fellow Maiden Newton Runner, Dave Butt, who has won the Over 60s category in the Great Britain duathlon trials. Dave will therefore be travelling to Madrid next year to represent Great Britain, and Maiden Newton Runners, in the European Championships. The duathlon is comprised of a 5K run, a 25K bike ride and another 5K run, all of which Dave performs at an alarming speed. Dave tells me that he is looking forward to wearing the GB colours, and to the soothing attentions of the team masseur. I hope he won’t forget to pack the Maiden Newton Runners club flag so that if he wins gold our colours can be run up the flagpole, and the stadium can echo to the sound of our club anthem, ‘Slow Down, You Move Too Fast’.

Closer to home, the darker evenings have seen us dusting off our headtorches and hi-viz clothing. In late October we did an evening run with a Thomas Hardy theme, starting at Max Gate and heading for his cottage in Thorncombe Woods. Unfortunately we lost our bearings on the heath and ran round in circles for a while as if using our headtorches to recreate the scene in The Return of the Native when the lights of glow worms ‘dotted the hillside like stars of a low magnitude’. Eventually we found our way back to town in time for curry night at The Trumpet Major, which probably wasn’t an option for Thomas Hardy when he was planning an evening out 100 years ago.

With Christmas coming it is time for this column’s traditional running question about what to buy the runner in your life. As always, my co-panellist Mr Les Knott-Bother was full of the Christmas spirit (once I had warmed him up with some mulled wine and mince pies). I told him about a new training option for runners, which is a weighted vest, designed to help build endurance. His suggestion is to save money and follow his approach of wearing a string vest and carrying the extra weight yourself. When it comes to stocking fillers I struggled to persuade Mr Les Knott-Bother of the merits of sport socks (no need for socks to be anything but nylon), energy gels (never eat anything that comes in a sachet) or deodorants (they encourage people to make themselves sweaty) but in the end we reached agreement on the best thing to give a runner this Christmas. The ideal present is a box of luxury chocolates, which can give a welcome energy boost before a run, after a run or instead of a run.

Views from the Back of the Pack - March, April and May

by Dave Webb

May 2014
Some of us in the running club have recently spent time in the USA. Jackie and I were there during the Easter holidays, which meant we missed one of the big events in the Maiden Newton Runners calendar. This year’s Johnny Kipps race took place on 13 April, and saw 11 club members running the circular route from Wynford Eagle to West Compton, Eggardon and back. Lin and Martin Lascelles were vying for first place but during their sprint finish Martin strained a muscle in his back, handing Lin the victory. Her joy was short-lived, however, because she then had to carry his luggage when they travelled to the States the next day.

Also on 13 April, Neil Goode, from Sydling, filled the club place at this year’s London Marathon, putting the months of training to good use to finish in 4:04. On the same day, in New York, I went for a morning jog in Central Park, where I found even more runners than usual. It turned out that the New York Women’s Half-Marathon was about to start. As I ran past thousands of runners lined up at the start, I heard a female announcer shout “Hello! You Guys! Oh My God! I’m So Excited!” I pictured the scene at the start line in Wynford Eagle, and decided it was unlikely that Lord Wynford was saying similar things to the Maiden Newton Runners. When the New York runners all joined in a hearty rendition of The Star-Spangled Banner I decided that it was time to jog on. For the most part, race announcers in the UK are more restrained, limiting their remarks to some safety instructions and a countdown to the start. I have noticed, though, a worrying trend at some events, such as Park Runs, for the organisers to lead the runners in a series of warm-up exercises, followed by some shouting. At least none of them has yet tried to make us sing the national anthem.

At this time of year, with the birds singing, the hedgerows blossoming and the trees in leaf, it is a delight to be running in the countryside. There are though some hazards to be avoided. As the fields fill with livestock you need to be sensible among the more skittish animals, and take care to avoid their droppings. Stinging nettles are particularly potent at this time of year, so this month’s running question asks for the best way to deal with them. I thought that my co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, would agree with me for once. His answer to most problems is to beat it with a big stick, which is my tip for stinging nettles, but he surprised me by recommending stinging nettle beer, with its refreshingly zesty tang.

Another landmark on the club’s calendar is the Maiden NewTen Madness, a 10K race which we organise each August. This year’s race will be the 10th and we are hoping for a big turnout. Our long-serving treasurer, John Wright, turns 70 this year. After some years in running retirement he plans to dust off his shoes and take part in this year’s race. So far his training has mostly been mental, ie he has been thinking about it, and he did claim to have done the Johnny Kipps, on his bike. Finally, on a personal note, I’ve been thinking a lot while I’m running about my Mum, who died on 4 May. She was no runner, but she did love the countryside, and requested that Psalm 121 be included in her funeral, as it was at her wedding. When running I will indeed “lift up mine eyes unto the hills”, while also keeping a beady eye out for cow muck on the ground.

April 2014
You may have noticed that Mo Farah fell over in the New York Half-Marathon and lost valuable time. At least there were no cow pats on the course, so he avoided some of the perils which faced Lin Lascelles when she took a tumble during the Dalwood 3 Hills race. She cut her leg when falling flat on her face, but got up and ran on through the mud. 2 days later she spent the evening in Outpatients after the cut became infected, which she attributes to the toxic properties of the local cow muck.

Mo had been hoping to set a ‘PB’ (personal best) but didn’t manage it, unlike 3 of our runners at the recent Yeovil Half-Marathon. Alice Moore took 8 minutes off her previous time, while the fastest hairdresser in the west was speedier than ever, having avoided the unscheduled stops that she made in previous years. Jackie Webb, meanwhile, took the most certain route to getting a PB by racing this distance for the first time. Pete James ran an evening 5K at Street; as he crossed the finish line he glanced at the clock, which read 19:57, and thought he had at last broken the 20 minute barrier. His team-mates then patiently explained the difference between race time (20:31 in his case) and real time (nearly 8pm). While Jackie was indulging herself on Mothering Sunday by running a half-marathon, the rest of the Webb household came out to cheer her on. This leads me to this month’s running question, which for once is aimed at the spectators: what is the best thing to shout at runners as they pass? The boys and I settled for comments like ‘Well done’ and ‘You’re looking strong’, or just ‘Keep going’. My co-panellist Mr Les Knott-Bother had quite a lot to say on this subject. He commented that he doesn’t have many runners passing through his living room (despite our notoriously poor navigation skills) but on his occasional forays outside, he has a growing repertoire of comments. Sometimes he goes for the simple ‘Stop running, you fool’, but he also likes to unsettle runners with something less predictable, such as ‘Repent! Your death is at hand’. Lately he says he has been trying a distraction technique, by shouting ‘If you stop running I’ll buy you a pint’, though he finds this works better with adult runners and it didn’t go down so well at last year’s school sports day.

There will certainly be plenty of spectators on 13 April for the big event in Britain’s running calendar. I am of course referring to the annual ‘Johnny Kipps’ run which we stage on a circular 6-mile route from Wynford Eagle to Eggardon via West Compton. There may be up to 15 people running, and perhaps another 5 spectating. On the same day there is another race competing for the nation’s attention, namely the London Marathon, which will have 35,000 runners and even more spectators. Among the runners will be Neil Goode, using our club entry, and I hope enjoying the experience.

Finally, there was a shocking suggestion at our March meeting, to move the meeting day from a Thursday to a Wednesday. John managed to silence any protests by extracting a dog-eared scrap of paper from his bag. Dating from 1987 this document proclaimed that Maiden Newton Runners was formed in October 1985, is affiliated to the Southern Association of the Amateur Athletics Association, that the club colours are black and white, and that the club meets on the 2nd Wednesday of each month at the Castle Inn. So it seems that Wednesday nights might be acceptable after all.

March 2014
The weather has continued to deter the less hardy runners, but as I write this there is sunshine outside and the prospect of a dry week. Consequently we now need to work on a range of new excuses, after a winter of having only to look out of the window before deciding to defer the possibility of running. Over the years we have had some imaginative, and sometimes mind-boggling, excuses presented for people not attending our monthly meetings. Derek Faulkner once claimed to be busy painting the inside of his chicken shed, John Wright was delayed by having locked himself out of his house and needing to find a small child to send in through the bathroom window, while Dan Cantrell sent a mysterious and possibly coded message to say that his boat was being capsized by the Commodore. This month’s ‘apologies for absence’ show how times have changed: Zoe was waiting at home for a Tesco delivery, while Charlie was at her Pilates class, which is not an excuse that was ever offered in previous years, by the likes of Stuart Hargreaves or Wilf Watts.

One of those who did attend the February meeting was Dave Carnell, who received a special trophy at our recent AGM, the ‘Billy No Mates’ award for doing the most races on his own. He was suffering from a blocked ear at the meeting, so perhaps could not fully appreciate our ‘affectionate’ banter on the subject.

We had to decide whether to stage the series of 5K races in Poundbury again this summer. In the end we decided that there were some problems with the course, and there are now so many free 5K Park Runs available that the outcome would be too uncertain to justify the effort involved (in other words, we found another excuse for not doing something). Instead we will put more effort into promoting the 10th running of the ‘Maiden NewTen Madness’ on 9 August. A quick ‘brainstorm’ of possible ideas did not last long, due to the limited brainpower at our disposal, but we did return to Dave Butt’s previous Big Idea of a weight-based handicap. All runners would be loaded with weights so that everyone carried as much weight as the heaviest runner. Lin thought this was deliberately intended to disadvantage lightweights like herself, and to favour the larger runner, like Dave and me. Whether Dave C’s ears were in full working order at this point, I don’t know, but for some reason he launched into a lecture that took in elements of Roman military history, etymology and the corruption of the language. The upshot was that he proposed a 10th anniversary theme of ‘Decimation’, using the word in its true historical sense, whereby every 10th person is killed. Thus the 10th finisher, the 20th, 30th and so on would each be shot, like a Danish giraffe, though not before they had had their entry fee reimbursed. We settled on a less controversial plan to encourage runners who are having a ‘round-number’ birthday in 2014. John Wright will be 70, Dave Butt 60, and we cover other bases down to 30. Currently we are seeking a runner who will be 20 in 2014, and another who will be 80, not to mention 90.

This month’s running question asks how best to clean muddy shoes. It’s best not to use the washing machine as the gel will melt, the shoes will shrink and you will have nothing to show for all your hard work getting them dirty. My co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, says you should never get your shoes muddy in the first place, and if you do need to venture outside, wear a pair of wellies.

Exe to Axe Revisited

On deciding to do the Exe to Axe race again this year, the first thing I did was check and see how long it took me the last time I ran it, "a couple of years ago".  I was horrified to discover that it was actually 2008, proving that as you get older (and older) time does indeed go by faster and faster.

This is a tough, point to point race starting in Exmouth and following the South West coast path back to Seaton. It's name is slightly misleading in that the finish is actually about a mile short of the River Axe, but I'm not complaining, it's quite far enough! One of the main difficulties is getting to Seaton by 8.30am to catch the bus to the start....on the morning that the clocks go forward.  After a largely sleepless night worrying about what the time really was, we safely arrived at 8.25am only to discover that one person had forgotten to put his clock forward....yes, you've guessed, the coach driver!  This was mildly amusing at first but by the time the replacement driver finally arrived at 9.10am it was no longer funny and I was beginning to feel stressed.

We finally arrived in Exmouth at 9.52am, leaving just enough time to sprint to the loo, shed a few layers, throw our bags in the van (hoping that we would indeed be reunited with them later as promised) and toe the start line.  So much for a nice pre race warm up............

On the dot of 10am we set off and after a brief stretch on the road turned onto the coast path and started climbing up to pass the Geoneedle and continue on the gentle uphill climb towards Sandy Bay. Martin and I were running together, this was after all a training run, not a race, and I displayed huge will power by not chasing after a girl who started very fast and soon disappeared into the distance.  This initial stretch from Exmouth, winding through caravan parks is both the least attractive and least familiar part of the route and it was with some relief that we picked up the wooded path that drops down into Budleigh Salterton. Martin was already muttering about the pace being "too fast" and that he wouldn't be able to keep up but unfortunately selective deafness meant that I couldn't hear him........

An easy run along the promenade into Budleigh led to the first water station and the point where the path turns inland along the River Otter for half a mile or so in order to cross the bridge and head back towards the coast.  At this point I became aware of both being able to see the leading lady ahead of me and also Axe Valley Runner, Amy, behind me, casually chatting away as I struggled up the hill desperately trying to get enough oxygen to run, never mind chat.  On reaching the coast there is another steep climb and at this point Martin started to drop back. As this coincided with the leading female coming back to me I callously abandoned him and kept going, still aware that Amy was breathing down my neck.

Another drop down into Ladram Bay followed - I could no longer hear Amy behind me and I found that without having made any conscious effort to increase the pace, I had caught up the speedy leading female. We both dropped to a walk up through the steep wooded section out of Ladram and had a brief conversation - which was slightly embarrassing as she clearly knew me and claimed that we had met at Barnstaple parkrun, another indication of my greatly advanced age as I had absolutely no recollection of it at all.  As she seemed inclined to chat and I was starting to think that maybe I could win this race, er, I mean training run, I started trying to drop her.  Considering how quickly I had caught her up she was quite stubborn. We passed High Peak (onto familiar Four Trigs territory now), dropped down into Sidmouth, along the front and then on a detour inland through the streets due to a land slide before starting the first of the killer climbs that feature in the second half of this race.  As we started the climb my clingy female rival finally started dropping back.

The key point to remember, should you ever do this race, is that all the "real" hills are in the second half - after climbing up from Sidmouth you drop down to Salcombe, before climbing up and then dropping down to Westonmouth before climbing back up and dropping down to Branscombe and the final horrendous climb up out of Branscombe. It's a bit like being on a slow motion roller coaster......One of the advantages (the only advantage actually) of the climbs is that they afford plenty of opportunity to look back across the valley and check if any sneaky Maiden Newton Runners are creeping up on you.  I was extremely relieved NOT to see Martin or any other women either, because my legs were starting to feel pretty tired and I'm not sure if I could have picked the pace up if the need arose.

After climbing up out of Branscombe there is some fairly easy running (on Grizzly territory now) before the drop down into Beer and the dreaded steps up to the cliff path.  My Garmin had already registered 20 miles and it was clear that the cliff path diversions had added considerable distance.  My legs were shot and I knew that there was still a stiff climb up through the trees on the new permissive path above Seaton ahead of me. Once I'd toiled to the top of that, half a mile of plodding along the road followed before turning back down to the sea and the final glorious swoop along the promenade to the finish......22 miles, over 3000 feet of climbing, glorious views, fantastic weather and a confidence boosting 12th place overall.  What more could you ask for... apart from beating Martin by 16 minutes and claiming revenge for the trouncing he gave me at the Grizzly?

I was especially pleased that I had beaten my 2008 time by 7 minutes, despite the distance being almost a mile further....perhaps age isn't such a bad thing after all.

View(s) from the Back of the Pack

by Dave Webb

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK - DECEMBER 2013  

By the time you read this you may well have completed your Christmas shopping. If, on the other hand, you have the organisational skills of the typical Maiden Newton Runner, then you won’t have started. In case it’s not too late, here are some Christmas present tips for the runner in your life. Like most men, my view is that you can’t go too far wrong with socks. Runners get through a lot of socks, through a Churchillian combination of mud, toil, sweat and untrimmed toenails. Food and drink are also safe bets. Running magazines normally carry esoteric recipes involving quinoa, soya mince and blueberries, but Maiden Newton Runners prefer chips and beer, and we are also very partial to cake.

A book at Christmas is always welcome, so here is this column’s first book review. Mo Farah’s autobiography, Twin Ambitions, gets a bit repetitive, ie I ran this race and then I ran that race, and then I did another race. But it also turns out that he has something in common with Maiden Newton Runners, namely a tendency to get lost. When Mo was a teenage athlete he lost several races through navigational errors. In his case the problem was that he was leading the race, so had no one to follow, and his English wasn’t good enough to understand the pre-race route description. In our case we are so far behind there is no runner in front to follow, and although our English is generally adequate, our concentration and memory for pre-race instructions are unreliable.

Something else I learned from Mo’s book is that he likes an espresso 20 minutes before a race. Coincidentally, Zoe Hayward took a similar strategy to the recent Street 5K evening race. After a tiring day at work she decided to pep herself up with a mixture of Pro-Plus, banana and apple. On the way to the race she didn’t stop talking, and before the race she spooked her clubmate Dave Carnell by fixing him with a manic stare and telling him she would beat him this time. Dave shot off so fast that he was in 2^nd place at the 1^st corner, which meant that by halfway he was worn out and there to be beaten. Unfortunately Zoe had mistimed her pre-race ingestions so that she ran out of steam soon after the start and took longer than usual. Behind her, the fastest hairdresser in the west, Charlie Spencer, won her age category and went home with a bottle of wine.

This month’s running question has a festive feel: is it a good idea to go for a run on Christmas Day? There are some running fanatics who insist on running every day. Ron Hill has not missed a day of running since 1964. For the rest of us, a short walk after lunch will be the most exercise we get on Christmas Day, though we might do something a bit more active on Boxing Day. My co-panellist Mr Les Knott-Bother surprised me by saying that he sometimes runs on Christmas Day….if he mistimes his comfort breaks during the Coronation Street Christmas Special.

Finally, we saw 2 instances this month of how one second can make all the difference. In the US, Martin Lascelles ran in the Thanksgiving Day ‘Turkey Trot’ and beat his previous best half-marathon time by 1 second, finishing in 1.25.39. Closer to home, Dave Butt set a new best time at the Weymouth Park Run, also by 1 second, when winning the race in 19.45. Not bad for 2 ‘old-timers’ who are approaching 60! The following weekend Dave set a new personal best for the 5K distance, 19.35, proving to the rest of us that it is possible to get quicker as you get older.

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK – JANUARY 2014

It has become a running club tradition to go for a long group run on New Year’s Day. With a weather forecast for heavy rain, flooding and gale force winds, some of us hesitated this year but our unstoppable chairman, Phil England, insisted that we would run and we would enjoy it. I think he might have been a PE teacher in a former life. 12 of us set off from Maiden Newton and were soon soaked through. We sheltered briefly in a barn at Wynford Eagle, where the unstoppable Phil decided to go home, citing a calf injury. The rest of us plodded on, debating at Higher Wynford whether the rain had now turned to hail, or if we were learning a new equation, rain + strong wind = pain to the face. When we crested the hill above West Compton the crosswinds blew us sideways, until we found another barn in which to shelter. Happily, Martin and Lin had visited earlier and stowed away a bag of goodies: Cava, cake and flapjacks. The wind whistled through the barn while we toasted in the New Year. Jim had brought a gizmo for measuring wind speed. Bravely, he stepped outside into the storm, and recorded a gust of 37.8mph. Lin’s baking, however, was equal to the challenge. She had followed a Nigella recipe, for chocolate and Guinness cake, which was delicious. Although Lin had decided to omit Nigella’s special patent ‘go faster’ icing sugar, we made it home in time for a hot shower, a good lunch and an afternoon of feeling exhilarated and then exhausted.

Not all of us take our running to such extremes. Some people stick to shorter distances, while Louise Goodman has admitted to driving her car alongside her younger daughter, shouting instructions out of the window while Bea runs alongside. My colleague, Mr Les Knott-Bother, was very taken by Louise’s approach and thinks there may be a place for him in the running club after all.

This being the season for New Year’s resolutions, our running question this month asks, ‘What is the best way to get started?’. The general advice is to build up slowly. For some people this means buying a pair of running shoes, looking at them for a while, and then putting them in a cupboard. Other people follow a more traditional ‘walk-run’ programme in which you gradually build up the ratio of running to walking. Mr Les Knott-Bother also favours the gradual approach. He says he is training to build up his mileage until he can walk from the paper shop to the pub without stopping.

There are fewer races at this time of year, and the weather is often miserable, so our club runs can be a good way to get us out running. They can also be unexpectedly eventful. Only 2 people, Dave B and Pete, turned out for a recent Wednesday night run in Dorchester (there was a third person, Neil, but in true club tradition he went to the wrong place and missed all the action). The two of them set off past Hangman’s Cottage, down to the riverbank, where they heard someone calling for help. By the dim light of their head torches they could see a man in the river. With no thought for their own safety they leapt into the raging torrent, with the water so deep that it was nearly coming over their socks. The truth of the situation gradually became clear. The man had been driving his brand new motorised disability scooter along the footpath when, in the dark, he had misjudged his line and plunged into the icy waters. Our runners helped him up on to the safety of the bank, then heaved the disability scooter out of the water. A neighbour looked after the man while Dave and Pete ran on, with soggy socks and shoes, proving that there is more than one way to get wet while running.

VIEW(S) FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK – OCTOBER & NOVEMBER 2013 - by Dave Webb

October:

Our September meeting began with a surprise: we have been given 2 club flags, as thanks for our help with the Sydling Marathon. All we need now is a flagpole, and perhaps a rota so that members can take it in turns to fly the flag at home. We may also need to develop a club salute (taking care to avoid any gestures that could be misinterpreted), and to continue our search for a club anthem (my idea was ‘Keep On Running’, but Mr Les Knott-Bother suggested ‘Sit Down’).
We should perhaps have taken our flag to Sydling for their annual 5K Fun Run on 6th October. 12 of the 24 participants were Maiden Newton Runners or our relatives. Phil England and Dave Carnell came 1st and 2nd in the men’s race, Zoe Hayward, Charlie Spencer, Jackie Webb and Alice Moore filled the 1st 4 places in the women’s race, and a junior Webb, Matt, won the boys U17 category. By the end of the race it must have felt like our invasion was complete and we could have started flying our flag over their village hall. We also had a good go at polishing off their post-race cakes.
Next up is the Parrett Trail Relay. This takes the form of 6 legs, covering 53 miles, starting on the coast near Bridgwater and finishing at Winyards Gap. Each leg starts at a pre-determined time, before the previous leg has finished, which makes the transport arrangements almost unfeasibly complicated. All we need to do is to follow these simple instructions: “The Poes drive to end leg 3 and meet Neil, who picks up Frank and drives to the start of leg 3. The Webbs drive to the end of leg 3 and meet up with Liz and James. Jackie and Liz start running at 11.45, leaving me with the boys and we drive to the end of leg 4. Frank and Neil finish leg 3, collect the Poes’ car, drive back to get Neil's car, then Frank drives to the end of leg 4. Charlie drives Zoe to the end of leg 4. Frank stays with the boys till Jackie and Liz finish. I drive Charlie's car to the end of leg 5, where Phil and I start running at 1.20. Zoe and Charlie collect their car at the end of their leg. Then Phil and I run to the pub, you all drive to the pub, and if we've worked that lot out then we will all need a drink!” If we make it to the start of each leg, we must then navigate our way cross-country, which brings me to this month’s running question: should one check out a race’s route in advance? Sports psychologists suggest practising on the route so you can visualise yourself running strongly on the day. Our club view is that if you know where you’re going, there is less chance of getting lost and having to run further than necessary. My co-panellist Mr Les Knott-Bother surprised me with a literary quotation. Apparently the writer Jasper Fforde commented that “First, time spent on reconnaissance is never wasted. Second, almost anything can be improved with the addition of bacon”. Mr Knott-Bother was dubious about the first proposition but wholeheartedly agreed with the second.
With the days drawing in, there is less daylight for our evening runs. Lin and Martin led a Wednesday night group through the dark fields around Frampton, which revealed the inadequacy of most people’s headtorches, particularly when it came to the tricky manoeuvre of trying to avoid cowpats in the dark. Lin made people feel better by providing home-made quiche and cakes afterwards, which were eaten in the bus shelter in the dark, by the feeble light from the runners’ headtorches, with the aroma of cow muck on their shoes drifting into the air of the night.

November:

Last month I described the club’s invasion of Sydling St Nicholas for their annual fun run. Since then some of our members have ventured a little further afield. We sent 2 teams into deepest Somerset for the Parrett Trail relay and were relieved to see everyone return safely, with no one getting lost and everyone following my ‘simple’ transport instructions.
Pete James travelled up to Gateshead, where he planned to do the local 5K ‘Park Run’. Unfortunately he overslept, and missed the race, but he did get up in time to tackle the Premier Inn’s ‘All You Can Eat Breakfast’. Martin and Lin Lascelles went even further, flying across America to compete in the Long Beach Marathon. Despite the jet lag they both ran well, with Lin finishing second in the women’s race, attracting the attention of the local press. Some of you may not be regular readers of the Long Beach Sports Gazette, so will have missed her interview where she summarised the club spirit by announcing “I’m glad it’s over so now I can go and get a beer”. I regret to report, however, that Lin failed to mention the club name, so ‘Maiden Newton Runners’ did not appear in the American sports press. Not only this, but she and Martin also forgot to take the club flag, so were unable to plant it in the Californian sand; imagine if Neil Armstrong had unpacked his bag when he got to the moon and found that he had forgotten his American flag.
With Lin away, and Phil working up north, we had no one to chair our October meeting. Into the breach stepped Charlie, keen to show how a meeting should be run. She surprised us by starting with ‘Any Other Business’, perhaps keen to earn the title of ‘fastest chairperson in the west’, to go with ‘fastest hairdresser in the west’. Lin had asked her to get the meeting’s views on whether this year’s New Year’s Day run should take place on 1 January or 29 December. We explained that the New Year’s Day run needs to happen on New Year’s Day, otherwise it would need a different name.
The meeting then diverted into medical matters. Dave Butt mentioned that his son Nick is a trained sports therapist as well as a podiatrist – presumably he is the ideal man for treating Athlete’s Foot! Zoe has had trouble for years with a verruca. No treatment has worked so she decided instead to make it look nicer by painting it with nail varnish. She didn’t specify which colour she used, but after a week the verruca disappeared. She offered this advice freely to our medical members (2 GPs, a nurse and a vet), while Frank piped up on behalf of yoga. After 2 years he has had no injuries, is very bendy and exudes inner calm. Finally, this month’s running question asks how you can make yourself keep running when your body is telling you to stop. The accepted wisdom is that you need to develop mental strength so that you focus on the success of completing the race, rather than the discomfort you are feeling. A leading marathon runner, Ryan Hall, has been quoted as saying ‘Pain is temporary, pride is forever’. My co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, also quoted a well-known motivational speaker, Homer J Simpson, who famously advised his son Bart: “If at first you don’t succeed, give up”.

Stoke Stampede

This traditional Boxing Day race has been moved to the first Sunday after, which makes sense, I suppose, although it means that we no longer have much excuse for not doing a fast time at what is a reasonably flat course. Situated in the middle of the Somerset Levels you would expect it to be even flatter though, and there are a couple of undulations of about 50 feet, so it is not a super fast course like the Easter Bunny at Yeovilton. But its fast enough, and its also a nice, rural route, with few cars, and only a few puddles this year. Like the last time we ran it, 2 years ago the weather was perfect, managing to catch the middle of a rare patch of nice weather in the middle of a horribly wet and windy spell.
We arrived an hour early, to make sure of a good close-in parking spot, but were nearly frustrated and forced to park over a mile away because coming from the west instead of the east to avoid potential floods, we encountered three separate sets of  marshals directing traffic to an emergency car park miles from the start because the usual parking field was completely waterlogged. Luckily, experienced hands that we are, and without a shred of conscience we bluffed our way past them, first pretending to not be runners, then promising to pick up numbers, and return to the remote parking field, then finally, refusing to stop at the checkpoint, instead shouting "just going to register" out of a partially opened window, and pretending to be deaf  to the cry of "parking is back that way". The reward was to arrive at a half-empty car park, next to the village hall, 20 yards from where we picked up our numbers and more importantly attended to various personal matters involving certain paper products and soap.
We then changed and waited in our car for a relaxing twenty minutes watching the weary hordes trudging in from the car park 2 villages away to collect their numbers, before making a final pre-race pit stop and heading out on a warm-up loop to the start half a mile away. Near the start we met Lesley, and briefly chatted, keeping our distance to avoid the cold she warned us of. Then we completed our warm-up running past the start and along the course past a stream of runners heading to the start. After a while we met our friend Jim and ran back with him to the throng where as always it was a pleasure to chat with him, and before we knew it, it was 11 am and after waiting a minute or two for a few stragglers to arrive there was a very short briefing and then the hooter got us underway.
As usual the initial pace was fast, although it didn't feel hard, but after a couple of K we hit the first, and main hill on the course, and the pain started. I was maintaining target pace, but just beginning to doubt if I could keep it up for long, however after overtaking a couple of runners on the way to the top, I felt better as we started back downhill around the loop to the 3k point, and then past the start again and another couple of kilometres before the next hill and the next test of my resolve and fortitude. This is always the hardest point on the course because it seems like a long uphill slog to the farthest point and 7k mark, this time I hung on fairly well, and reaching the turning off the main road (coincidentally near the distant location where the marshals had been directing people to park) I made a sharp left and commenced a welcome downhill stretch with less than 2 miles to go.

In previous years I have faded badly on this stretch, but this time things went better. First I reeled in a couple of young guys in Taunton shirts, then as I passed them at about 8k I was overtaken by a female runner who turned out to have won the race last year, and who said something which sounded vaguely encouraging like "don't let these youngsters beat you", but could equally have been "don't let this old git beat you". I couldn't actually make out which it was, but chose to take it as encouragement to me anyway, and picked up the pace a notch, pulling away from not only the guys, but the lady, and managed a last mile fast enough to finish just under my target time of 39 minutes.

Lin was not far behind, in a respectable time too. Strangely we had both run an undulating 10k course at a faster pace than a dead flat 5k, 4 days before, which goes to show that on race day, with a bit of competition and motivation, you can go a lot faster.

Both chuffed, we ran back up the course to encourage fellow Maiden Newton Runners John, and then Lesley, with whom we ran back to see her finish just under 50 minutes, a really good effort considering her status as a recovering cold-sufferer.

We waited around half an hour for Lin's honourable mention as 3rd female veteran, but none for me, there being only a single Vet category, so no chance for someone as old (and/or slow) as me! But never mind, I'm always happy to bask in Lin's reflected glory. Anyway, another fun race under our belts, and time to head circuitously out of the village en-route to a celebratory cup of coffee and slab of Christmas cake at Lin's parent's house 10 miles down the motorway.

Thanksgiving Day Turkey Trot Half Marathon

A few weeks ago we discovered that there was a half marathon on Thanksgiving Day just a 10 minute drive from our friend's house in San Jose and since we were going to be spending the day there anyway it seemed too good a chance to miss....so we signed up for it.

As with all these things they seem like a good idea at the time....but not when the alarm clock goes off in the middle of the night.  We left the house at 7am and headed for Hellyer Park and the Turkey Trot Half Marathon. Unfortunately the virus I picked up at the weekend had not gone away as hoped, the sore throat had returned overnight on Tuesday and I was feeling pretty wiped out, so I did the sensible thing........and raced anyway. 

It was a lovely sunny morning, just a bit on the cool side that early in the morning, but unimaginably warm compared with a late November morning in England.  First stop was finding the closest free parking (we could then feel smug watching the less savvy locals circling the $6 a day car park desperately seeking a space to park) and then walking over to the number pick up.  We got there just in time to hear the announcement that due to a power cut all the toilets in the park were locked because the flushes apparently need electric to work.......400 plus nervous runners and no toilets, every race organisers worst nightmare! Fortunately our route back to the car to drop off our excess clothing passed through another part of the park where there were a couple of porta loos......which we found ahead of the other 398 people who all appeared to be queuing for them a bit later on.  We may be country bumpkins from Dorset but we were way ahead of the local city dwellers and the race hadn't yet begun!

We were expecting the race start to be delayed due to the toilet dilemma but it was actually very prompt. The half marathon and 10k started together with the 5k getting under way 10 minutes later.  So at 8am sharp we were off on the mile loop of the picturesque lake before heading out on the Coyote Creek Trail for the rest of the course, which was a straightforward out and back. We weren't sure what the standard was going to be as this is only the second year the race has been held but our suspicion that it would not be very high proved correct. 

I had set my watch for 6.50 pace which is slower than my normal half marathon pace but I was being realistic about the sort of shape I'm in after 6 weeks of no regular training, too much food and alcohol and on top of that a virus (I had my excuses firmly in place).  The usual race start adrenalin rush made it feel easy for the first mile but unfortunately that didn't last for long and it soon started to feel like hard work.  After 4 miles I really just wanted to stop and lie down at the side of the trail but since that wasn't an option I gritted my teeth and resigned myself to another hour at least of feeling horrible!  It was made slightly harder by not feeling like a race, after the initial jockeying for places, I could see one person ahead of me on the straight parts of the trail but otherwise I could have been out for a morning run on my own.

At least I knew I was ahead of all the other female competition and the going was fairly easy.  There were a few undulations, the odd dip in the path and bridge crossing but on the whole it was a flat course and I was just about managing to hang on to the target pace.  As I neared the turn around point I started to meet the leaders coming back and started counting to see how Martin was doing.  It was fantastic to see him neck and neck with another runner in joint third place and looking comfortable.  The turn around was just across a foot bridge over the creek and I was 8th overall at that stage.  I had meant to take note of the time to see how far ahead I was of the next female when I passed her on the way back....but naturally I completely forgot!

There were about 3 or 4 women fairly close together and I spent the rest of the race expecting one of them to catch me up.  I pushed really hard to try and stay on the pace and I managed it until the 9 mile mark but after that I gradually dropped off and found myself working harder to run slower. Towards the end I started to pass the back markers in the 10k race, mostly walking, and I knew how they felt!  I had risked a couple of nervous glances over my shoulder and knew that there was one other runner behind me - male - and as I reached the point where the path split and headed back past the lake to the finish he overtook me dropping me down into 9th place.  Martin was waiting here too and said that I was second lady which gave me a bit of a jolt, I knew I was first unless someone had cheated..........but I tried to put it out of my head because I could see the clock ahead and I still had a chance to get across that line under 1.30.  Somehow I managed to find an injection of speed from somewhere and just made it....1.29.59!!  My worst half marathon time since 2009....


Martin had done really well and finished in 3rd place overall and a great time of 1.25.39 which he later realised was a PB for him.......by 1 second!  I was a bit worried by him thinking that I was second - he said that another girl with a half marathon number on had passed him whilst he was waiting for me. However, an announcement that the male course record had been broken was followed by another one saying that I had won and broken the course record by 5 minutes....so all was not lost.  Fortunately they were handing out the winners medals as the runners finished so we didn't have to wait around for a presentation and in all honesty all I wanted to do was go home and lie in a darkened room for several days........

Long Beach Marathon

After another sleepless night due to our delightfully noisy neighbours the alarm went off at 2.45 am and I have never felt less like running a marathon.  I came so close to blowing it off but I managed to convince myself that I'd start and if it felt really awful I'd just pull out. We were fortunate enough to get free entry since I met their elite criteria so nothing would be lost..... It seemed ridiculous to be eating breakfast at 3 am but with a 6 am race start that's what we had to do.  At least there was no stress involved in getting to the start, we left the apartment at 5.15 am and strolled there in 20 minutes or so.

Once we got to the start and started soaking up the atmosphere I began to think, ok, maybe I can do this. We positioned ourselves ready to get to the front of the field and as soon as the start funnel was opened up we rolled under the barriers and beat the rush - only to hear the bad news that the start would be delayed by 25 minutes due to safety issues. Just what we needed! Finally at 6.25 am we were off. Martin was in charge of pacing, my inclination is always to go off too fast and it was still just dark enough that I couldn't check pace on my GPS. Our target pace was 6.45 and it felt so easy for the first few miles as we crossed the river and headed down towards the Queen Mary. A few girls had gone off fast in front of me and it's a fairly good indication of how negative I was feeling that I didn't immediately give in to the urge to give chase.

As we ran along the scenic area on the shoreline past the Aquarium we reeled in the girl in 3rd place and I was just congratulating myself on moving into the placings when another girl overtook me and opened up quite a lead. We stayed on the pace and started the long section across the beach gradually catching up and passing one other female. Just before the half marathon split we caught the girl who had overtaken us a few miles earlier and exchanged a few pleasantries as we passed her. It took a while to shake her off but now I was in 2nd place, I knew I had no chance of catching the leader but I badly wanted to maintain both position and pace.

The miles ticked off and it became apparent that our GPS' were measuring the course long which meant that we weren't as well on pace as we had thought. We completed the out and back at the Marine Stadium and crossed the half way point in 1.29.33. It was already a given that we weren't going to achieve sub 3 today so I suggested we aim for 3.02 instead and hang onto the pace as long as we could. I could tell that Martin was struggling a bit already by his breathing and tried to encourage him to stay with me, which he gamely managed until after we had passed through the University campus - but then he gradually began to drift backwards.

The lack of long runs in our training was already telling and our pace had dropped off still more. I hate feeling so tired with 6 miles to go but there was nothing I could do except grit my teeth, dig deep and hope that I wouldn't be caught. A couple of times I tried glancing back, I could still see Martin and I was fairly sure there were no females closing in...but I couldn't be positive. I must be honest, the thought of the prize money was really the only thing that kept me going!

It was such a relief to hit East Ocean Boulevard and know that the end was finally within reach. Running past half marathoners gave me a bit of a boost but the tiredness remained and I so badly wanted to stop.  When the 3.05 pacer passed me with 2 miles still to go I really thought I'd blown it but he was finishing a bit fast and I crossed the line in 3.04.56 having maintained my second place.  Martin came in some 90 seconds later for the usual emotional reunion. I always find myself in tears at the end of a marathon!

As we headed away from the finish area we were intercepted by a volunteer who said she was to escort us to the VIP tent! How exciting and flattering was that! In addition to the very handsome finisher's medal and well stocked goody bag we were both given great Long Beach Marathon towels, I received my 2nd place trophy and we had a veritable feast of food and drink at our disposal. Sadly I can never eat straight after a hard run (although I always manage to make up for it later on) so I only managed some fresh fruit and coffee but Martin did his best to take full advantage and had the chefs make him a special vegetarian omelette!

Later we reluctantly left the festivities and headed back to our apartment for a much needed shower and change. On looking at the results, which were already on line, we discovered that Martin had finished 1st V55, so we headed back to pick up his medal and enjoy our courtesy visit to the Aquarium.

All that remained was to chose the venue for our evening celebration and as we really wanted some beer we went to the Beachwood BBQ and Brewery where we enjoyed a sampler selection of their finest beer and some excellent Albacore. What a day and how differently than expected  it turned out.

I love Long Beach, who needs to sleep?!

View From the Back of the Pack(s)

The latest two articles from Dave Webb:

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK – SEPTEMBER 2013

The annual Maiden NewTen Madness race means it is now a club tradition, on the 2^nd Saturday evening in August, for some of us to don hi-viz jackets and spend a couple of hours scattered around the local countryside. Our job is to encourage the runners and point them in the right direction, which can get a bit repetitive. There is a limit to how many ways you can say ‘Well done. Turn left’. Amongst this year’s runners we were pleased to see 2 of our newer recruits, the speedy-sounding Lesley Fox and Felicity Quick. All the competitors are spurred on by the prospect of cakes at the finish, but for the potential prize winners there was the extra incentive of one of Chrissy Ashley’s delicious lardy cakes. I’m sure that the medal winners at last year’s Olympics would have much preferred to receive one of Chrissy’s lardy cakes along with their medal, instead of the usual bunch of flowers. We would like to thank Chrissy and everyone who helped with the race.

In fact the question of race mementoes is important for both runners and race organisers. Runners in the Battle of Sedgemoor 10K at Langport have for years been presented with a bath towel. I last ran the race in 2009, and my co-runner in life’s race, Jackie, advised me that my towel needed refreshing, so I entered again this year. The route seemed to have developed several hills over the last 4 years, defying the usual speed of geological change, so by the finish I had worked up a sweat which called for a dab from the commemorative towel. Imagine my disappointment then to be presented instead with a bottle of water, a banana and a coaster. I consoled myself with the thought that the original protagonists of the Battle of Sedgemoor, in 1685, probably received neither the towel nor the coaster, nor even a lardy cake for their efforts. 

As well as the club’s summer Poundbury 5K series, there is now a ‘Park Run’ in Weymouth each Saturday morning. A total of 14 different members have run 5K races in the last month or so, prompting this month’s running question which asks how best to achieve a fast finish. The usual advice is to include some repeat sprint sessions in your training, and maybe to do a decent run first to get used to running fast when already tired. My co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, says that pacing yourself is crucial, ie start slow, don’t go too fast in the middle, and don’t speed up too soon. In other words, walk all the way and then fall over the finish line.

I have previously mentioned our forays into multi-sport events, like triathlons, duathlons and speed hairdressing. In August, at the club barbecue, we extended our repertoire by adding welly-wanging, rounders and a curious event in which competitors pick up a cereal box from the ground with their teeth, without their hands touching the floor, and with the height of the box being reduced each round until only the base of the box remains. This event showed that yoga practitioners and young people are the most supple, and that tall men can do themselves a mischief. Frank Poe won the welly-wanging with an impressive 39 metre throw, 1^st prize being a big courgette, while Jackie England and her team-mates surprised us by showing that rounders can be a contact sport, more akin to rugby.

Finally, I can report that the fastest hairdresser in the west, Charlie Spencer, was one of 5 club members who tackled ‘The Beast’, a notoriously challenging coastal course from Corfe Castle. Charlie was so chuffed and proud that, by the finish, she was also the most emotional hairdresser in the west, enjoying the feeling of personal achievement within a supportive team.

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK

When people tell us ‘You couldn’t run a race’, it’s hard to know if they’re talking about our running or our organisational skills. On the race-organising front, August 10^th sees the 9^th edition of the ‘Maiden NewTen Madness’. The route is a mixture of roads and tracks, including some decent mud in Wraxall Lane and along the riverbank. Any visiting townies will know they have been in the countryside, though they may be consoled by the cakes at the finish.

We have also been organising a summer 5K series this year, on a 5-lap circuit in Poundbury. The advantage of a multi-lap course is that it is harder for people to get lost. The disadvantage is that it requires people to count to 5. On our practice event, in May, Charlie Spencer attempted to count the laps of the passing runners, which grows more complicated as the faster runners lap the slower ones. We discovered that, while she may be the fastest hairdresser in the west, she is not the fastest counter in the west, so we decided to make runners responsible for counting their own laps. The races have gone well, though it would be good to see more runners. The last of these races is on 28 August, at 7.30 from the new Poundbury Leisure Centre.

A hazard of summer running can be the overgrown footpaths, and particularly the proliferation of nettles and brambles. Apparently the Romans introduced stinging nettles to Britain, to keep their soldiers warm in these chilly Northern climes. Jackie Webb certainly seemed somewhat heated when she slipped in the mud, pirouetted gracefully through the air, and landed in a nettle patch.

The summer season prompts this month’s running question, which is whether to run while you’re on holiday. When I sought the views of my co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, I discovered that he himself had gone on his traditional annual holiday, a house swap with his brother, Will, in Dorchester. I can report, though, that Mr Will Knott-Bother does not plan to run anything except a bath while he is in our midst. For my part, I have enjoyed some fantastic runs on the Pembrokeshire coastal path and the Lakeland trails in recent years so I will definitely be packing my running shoes. Some club members have taken it further, and have organised holidays around training camps or overseas races. Visitors to Dorset also seem to be ready to run. During the summer holidays a number of ‘unlicensed’ runners have been spotted in the local lanes.

Some club members prefer not to race, but others have been busy pinning on their race numbers. 5 Maiden Newton Runners competed in the Durberville Dash at Wool, 8 members ran in the Haselbury Trail 10K, and 6 were at the Shaves Cross Mini-Marathon. Given our tradition of getting lost it is remarkable that 6 people succeeded in even finding Shaves Cross, in the depths of the Marshwood Vale. Others of us have managed to get lost closer to home. Dave ‘Wiggo’ Butt got off his bike to join me on a long Sunday morning run which involved us going round and round in circles in the long grass at Kingcombe, while a group of us could be found wandering aimlessly through woods near Chetnole on a Wednesday night run.

We are always looking for new members; someone with a decent sense of direction would be most welcome. We are also looking for a ‘larger’ runner to join us, since we have a spare XL vest that we are seeking to fill. Any local runner, no matter how large or small, or how slow or fast, would be welcome to join our happy band.

Dave Webb 

View from the Back of the Pack - August

by Dave Webb

For some reason the sunny evenings seem to bring out more runners than the cold dark nights of winter. Our Monday night runs have seen as many as 16 people turn out for a run and a chat. Some runners are more talkative than others, with Dan Cantrell being our foremost chatterbox, although Charlie Spencer is never normally short of a word. Not everyone is so loquacious, so this month’s running question asks whether you should talk while running. For me, the key is not to talk when you are out of breath, which at times can call for stealthy tactics. A well-timed question at the bottom of a hill can keep your co-runner talking while you climb. My co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, believes that talking requires your full attention, and he doesn’t like talking at a moving target, which is why he prefers not to run.

Our chief talker, Dan, tackled his first marathon on a hot Saturday at Sydling, in late June. As his clubmates we decided to run sections with him for 2 reasons. First, we wanted to give him some support, and second, in the name of science, we wanted to find out how many miles he needs to run before he stops talking. The chatter was fading as he approached halfway, but after a reviving cake stop, he picked up the conversational pace until he fell silent around the 23 mile mark.

Earlier in that race, runners were startled by the unexpected sight of a local farmer sitting naked in an old bath in the middle of a field, enjoying a bottle of beer. Running in the heat is hard work, so a bath and a beer are tempting prospects. It’s probably best, though, not to go naked, unless you are competing in the naturists’ annual ‘Bare If You Dare’ 5K. So far as I know none of my clubmates took part in this year’s race; if they did do so, then they kept it hidden, which would not be in the spirit of the event. Back at the Sydling Marathon, I am told that the farmer stood up to greet the last runner, which had the desired effect of making them run faster.

Some members of Maiden Newton Runners have been branching out into multi-discipline events. Dave ‘Wiggo’ Butt is a demon on the bike, averaging about 25 miles an hour in his weekly 25-mile time trials. Phil England has put us all to shame with his triathlon exploits. As I write this he is tackling his 3^rd ‘Ironman’ : a 2.4 mile swim, then 112 miles on the bike, and a 26.2 mile run to finish off. His goal is to break the 12-hour mark, though the hot weather may slow him down.

I have had some questions as to whether the fastest hairdresser in the west is speedier at hairdressing or running. I must stress that she takes her time on the hairdressing, though she has recently tried a new multi-discipline event, ‘hair-running’. Martin Lascelles started running, while Charlie cut Lin’s hair before they both rushed off in their trainers to catch him up. The key for these multi-discipline events is a speedy transition. Charlie had her running kit on so that she only needed to whip off her apron, drop the scissors, and set off. In triathlons there are strict rules about no nudity and no swearing during the transition phases, which is a problem for those of us who find it hard to get out of a wetsuit without exposing ourselves and cursing loudly. I am sure that Phil has no such problems, and I look forward to reporting his Ironman exploits next month.

Oxley Triathlon

Well it’s been a funny old year. Richard seems to have given up running except for occasional jaunts around the orchard and then complaining his hay fever is getting worse. So races have become a bit sparse. However I entered this as an early bird back in February (saves a few pounds) and maintained the cycling/running/swimming training until recently when my right leg was struck down by a mysterious pain. Stopped each of the above activities in turn but it made no difference, and after a month of no training except working on the allotment, was feeling more than the usual apprehension on Sunday morning.

So we had the usual panic about missing/forgotten equipment, and problems were only increased by the leisure centre moving the female changing rooms to the far end of the pool and then not labelling one of the doors. So after a last minute sprint to transition and back and a delay at the start I was ready to start my swim. Can’t say more than it went OK. I was slightly faster than the other two competitors in my lane (which doesn’t say much for them), and as I was in a middle lane had to flounder over the edge to get out. (Think penguins leaping out onto the ice and imagine the opposite). The bike section went well enough, didn’t want to risk the dodgy leg by pushing too hard, and only had one minor gear change problem. I wondered what the horrible noise was as I hurtled downhill with my legs trying to go as fast as Victoria Pendleton on a turbo. Looked down the chain was on 2nd gear and the indicator said 3rd. Sorted that and finished OK – no falling off this year, then off on the run.

Took this very steady as my last run had been in the rec more than a month before and I’d had to give up after 4 laps (1.3 miles). But it all went well enough. Some said the course had been changed but apart from the transition area being moved onto the field near the finish and the re-entry to the field being slightly different, it was all the same. As I came into the field ready to tell the next youngster charging past that I was old enough to be his mother, I looked over my shoulder and it was Dickie Wythe rushing past. I recognised him from Somerset Series races many years ago and by chance his finishing position was one place ahead of me.

I decided to have a shower before I left and headed back to the changing room to be met with a big space where I’d left my clothes & shoes. Panic set in, asked everyone I could see if the missing items had been found. Went back for a second look and found a man had mistaken the female changing room for the men’s. So looked in the unlabelled door and there were my clothes. Panic over. If that all sounds confusing, it’s because it was. But many thanks to the Wessex Wizards lady who helped me.

For the record I finished in 2:03:21 full results are here:  https://www.fullonsport.co.uk/fos/index.php?module=results&action=results&eventId=4119
Richard didn’t take any photos but there are some on: http://www.charleswhittonphotography.com/search.html?search=x13
Copyright prevents me from copying them here.

Late summer Madness

In June of every year Phil starts mumbling that he hasn't done anything about the Madness yet and we all avoid eye contact and someone quickly changes the subject.......but somehow by the second Saturday evening of August everything comes together and the Maiden Newten Madness is a resounding success without us having to do anything........it's magic!

This year the weather was perfect, the entries were up, we had a new results system which (phew!) actually worked, the cakes were fabulous, the marshals were outstanding.......and 128 runners hopefully enjoyed every inch of their 10k "and a bit" race.  It was great to see lots of familiar faces - support from Yeovil Town RRC and Egdon Heath has been marvelous every year - but also lots of new faces too in the 9th year of the event.

One of the new faces (I may be wrong, but I don't think we've ever had any Bridport Runners do the event previously) was Ben Renshaw - not content with winning the first of our Poundbury 5k series back in June, he proved that it wasn't a fluke and was the comfortable overall winner of the race in 40.01. Obviously now he has to come back next year and run it 2 seconds faster!


Alan Chiverton from Westbourne AC (or Wimborne if you're Phil doing the results without his glasses on) came home in 2nd place with Edward Gibbs from YTRRC taking 3rd place.

The winner of the ladies race was another new face, Jenny Guard from Leeds City who finished in an excellent 13th place overall and was only 27 seconds outside the course record set in 2009. In 2nd place was Lynn Hutchings from Wimborne AC and in third place, taking the FV55 prize was Carol Jones from Ealing Southall and Middlesex AC - who  also came 4th on a previous visit to Dorset in 2009. The other female vet category winners were Rose Harvey (FV35) from Yeovil Town RRC, just taking it easy tonight after winning last year's event and Sandra Hood from Weymouth St Paul's Harriers was first V45.  Weymouth St Paul's also produced the 1st junior female home in 53.39, Holly O'Flannagan.

The male category prizes all went to local clubs - Egdon Heath Harriers took the MV40 prize (Steven Horsler in 42.49) and MV50 (John Cook in 45.06) and Yeovil Town RRC's Nick Brooke took the MV60 prize in 43.42 despite the distance being about 40 miles shorter than he usually runs......

I must just finish by saying that despite my flippancy at the beginning, we all know that Phil and Jackie put a huge amount of effort into making the race a huge success whilst the rest of us just stand around trying to look as though we have some purpose in being there.  We have a lot of support from non runners/members who year on year get roped in to help us out and do so willingly and cheerfully - being a small (but perfectly formed!) club we would not be able to stage the event without their help, so a big thankyou to all of them too.

Next year will be an all-singing, all dancing 10th anniversary event, so please come back and run it again and bring some club mates and friends with you because in 2014 Phil is going to start that muttering at least a month earlier in preparation........................

Results will be posted shortly on the Full On Sports website (there will be a link from the MNR site) and we have a huge selection of photographs which will be on the MNR Facebook page later this evening...if they EVER finish uploading.

Plym Valley Parkrun

As anyone who reads Dave’s entertaining minutes or VFTBOTP will know, Martin and I have been on a 5k-fest over the last 2 months in a bid to regain my race fitness whilst recovering from a long term Achilles injury.  We’ve become Park run junkies and have added quite a few new races to the list of Park runs that we’ve completed.

Each Parkrun has its own character and they differ widely from anything between 1 to 4 laps of parks, sports fields, tow paths, cycle paths, tarmac, mud, stones, the list is endless. The three things that they all have in common is that they take place at 9am every Saturday morning, they’re free and they’re great fun.

Last weekend we headed down to Devon to take part in the most westerly Park run in this country – Plym Valley. Of the ones we’ve done to date it’s also probably the most scenic and rural.  After a night spent “wild” camping at Cadover Bridge we arrived in the National Trust car park at Plymbridge Woods at 8.30am, bright eyed and raring to go......Well that’s not strictly true, Martin had a splitting headache, a strange numbness to various parts of his body and a strong conviction that he had suffered a mild stroke overnight.  I was definitely raring to go -to the loo, if only there had been one................

The start is in a lovely flower meadow between a cycle path and the river Plym. A large clockwise lap of the flower meadow takes you back past the start and onto the canal tow path before a short steep climb onto a cycle path which leads you back to the start and a further, smaller anti clockwise loop of the meadow.  Simple right?

By 9am a (what is the appropriate collective noun?) pack of Parkrunners had gathered on the vaguely defined start line and it was apparent that we were not the only Plym Valley Parkrun virgins as we jostled for prime position (which meant trying to find the least rutted piece of grass to run over to the start of a well trodden path).  Some Parkrun announcements and jokes followed and then we were off.

As usual I settled in somewhere behind Martin and followed my usual strategy of judging my pace off him.  Unfortunately this didn’t work as well as usual – either he was taking it easy or I was going way too fast.  The field spread out as we reached the end of the meadow and turned back on ourselves and my GPS confirmed that the first 1km had been completed slightly faster than was sensible but not fast enough that I should still be so close behind Martin.   As we neared the point where we ran back past the start I heard a man with a couple of young kids say “there’s Mummy” and thought that I had a rival.....but it turned out that he had said “where’s Mummy?” because he followed it up with the very unsupportive comment of “miles back I expect”!

We came out of the meadow and turned onto the tow path for a half mile of fairly level easy running (as long as you avoided veering off into the canal) and I focussed on trying to keep up with a figure slightly ahead in a familiar Grizzly t-shirt.  At the end of the tow path section there was a very sharp climb up onto a cycle path which bled the speed from our legs but was followed by a slightly downhill section on tarmac where I managed to throw in a fast km.

With just over a km to go it was back into the flower meadow to complete the second, smaller lap and as I reached the point where the route divided the two lead runners blasted past on their way to the finish, both recording excellent sub 18 minute times.  I managed to overtake a couple runners on this last loop and was pushing hard for the finish, my target being to beat the vet 45 age category course record.  A final push for the finish line, taking one more male scalp en route, to finish in 10^th place overall, first lady and a time of 20.36, beating the current FV45 record by a very satisfying 40 seconds.  Martin had also managed to set a new MV55 course record but was very disappointed with his time – 20.14, which was unexpectedly slow for him but at least he had got his excuses well publicised before the start.

As usual at Parkrun there was a lovely friendly atmosphere and we had a chat with the runner in the Grizzly t-shirt, who it turned out recognised our name and has been a reader of the MN blog in the past, and also a Poole Parkrun regular who recognised us and was also taking advantage of a weekend away to try out a new course.

Next week we’re off to Barnstaple for a second run round Rock Park, but if you want to do a Parkrun without the excessive travelling, don’t forget that Weymouth Parkrun starts on the 31^st August and Yeovil (at Montecute) have their first event the following week.  For those willing to travel a little further Parkrun is also coming to King’s Park in Bournemouth on the 24^th August.

All that remained on this lovely sunny morning in Devon was to find a suitable venue for our customary post Park run refreshment.......................................

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK – JULY

by Dave Webb

In mid-May we entered 2 teams for the Wessex Ridgeway Relay. This is a 100km cross-country, self-navigating event that starts in Wiltshire at 7.30 on a Sunday morning.  We gave careful thought to which runners should do the 1^st leg, before deciding that it should be Richard Blackmore and Phil England, on the grounds that they were absent from the meeting and therefore could not protest about the early start. Overall the day was a great success – our definition of success being that our runners found their way from the start to the finish. We ended the day just after 6pm at Uplyme, and could have finished slightly sooner had we not experienced some unexpected delays. Elite athletes don’t usually find themselves spending several minutes waiting for a woman to move 2 cows and their unco-operative calves, as Jackie and Alison did on Lancombe Lane. Then on leg 10 Neil Goode discovered that his pre-race meal was not agreeing with him, and had to spend some time behind a nearby bush. In fact, by the time Dave Butt and I crossed the finish line and headed for our free meal at The Talbot Inn, Neil was at home in bed feeling decidedly peculiar.

Now that the weather has finally improved we have been able to enjoy some beautiful club runs. On a Wednesday night in early June Martin and Lin led 7 of us on a scenic route from Shipton Gorge which sea views over Burton Bradstock before a steep climb to the top of Shipton Hill. If we’d had any breath left it would have been taken by the stunning panorama. The landscape of fields and hills, strip lynchets and hillforts could have been ancient, except for the electricity pylons and the noise from the A35. In fact this part of Dorset is known to be behind the times; in 1901 a bullock’s heart pierced with thorns and pins was found in a cottage chimney, being a traditional defence against witches. It makes Maiden Newton look positively modern.

The recent hot weather has prompted this month’s running question, which is what to wear when running in the heat. My advice is to wear a ‘technical’ running top, which is designed to ‘wick away’ the moisture (I told you we were modern in Maiden Newton). I am also a strong believer in something more traditional, namely a hat. This serves 2 purposes, in providing protection from the sun and in helping to obscure one’s red and toiling face. My co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, sas that it’s best not to run at all in the heat (he also believes that it’s best not to run in the cold, the wet, the dry or any other weather). If people do insist on running, he prefers it if they wear as little as possible.

Mr Knott-Bother should perhaps follow the old advice of being careful what he wishes for. On 7 July in Wales there is a race called the ‘Bare If You Dare 5K’. Runners are encouraged to wear only their shoes (and possibly a hat if they are sensible like me). The prospect of being a spectator at a race like this is positively alarming if the local runners look anything like their Dorset counterparts.

As well as running, we also organise some races, which are coming soon. At 7pm on the last Wednesdays of June, July and August we are holding a 5K race in Poundbury, from the new leisure centre. And on 10 August at 7pm we will be staging the annual Maiden NewTen Madness 10K race, from the Youth and Community Centre in Maiden Newton. Everyone is welcome to participate, however fast or slow, and a friendly atmosphere is guaranteed.

VIEW FROM THE BACK OF THE PACK – JUNE 2013

by Dave Webb

Last month I mentioned Shakespeare’s marathon advice: ‘Wisely and slow; they stumble that run fast’. I’m delighted to report that Charlie Spencer kept these words in mind as she ran round the streets of London, taking an amazing 10 minutes off her previous best time. She finished strongly in 4 hours, 15 minutes, making a bid to be the fastest hairdresser in London as well as the west. Charlie has also asked me to thank everyone who sponsored her. She has now raised a fantastic £1,800 for the Fortuneswell Cancer Trust in Dorchester.

To run a marathon requires a lot of training, so this month’s running question asks how you can tell if you are training too hard. Research has shown that overtraining can lead to constant sniffles, restlessness, irritability, broken sleep and poor short-term memory. During the latter stages of long runs the brain’s glucose supplies dwindle, making it harder to do mental arithmetic calculations. My co-panellist, Mr Les Knott-Bother, says that he has studied these symptoms, which sound very familiar, especially the one about finding it hard to do simple sums, like adding up his lottery losses. He now realises that he has been overdoing it for years and should ease off on the physical exercise.

In mid-April one of our long-distance members, Richard Rider, ran in the Honiton Hippo, a watery cross-country race that is named after the hippos that used to inhabit these parts. Apparently they lived here for about 100,000 years, and their remains were discovered when the by-pass was built. Richard wrote an entertaining race report on the club blog, complete with a picture of him immersed in water which was happily free from hippopotami.

The club has entered 2 relay races in May, bravely embracing the complex challenge of running and carrying a baton at the same time. This may sound like a simple task but nothing is straightforward for Maiden Newton Runners. Last year our start runner at the North Dorset Marathon Relay left the baton in his car and only retrieved it in time for the last 2 runners. We have also entered 2 teams, Maiden Newton Chalk and Maiden Newton Cheese, for the Wessex Ridgeway Relay. This means we therefore face the complicated logistics of organising 6 pairs of runners to cover the 62 mile course from Tollard Royal to Uplyme. Some clubs take these events very seriously but we see it as a triumph if we succeed in getting the runners, and the batons, from the start to the finish.

Preparations continue for our summer series of 5K races in Poundbury. These events are open to all, and will take place at 7.30pm on the last Wednesday of each summer month, starting at the new Dorchester Leisure Centre. Dave Butt has persuaded Dorset Cereals to provide a box of products for each race, which means we can offer some tempting spot prizes, and Olives et Al have agreed to donate a meal for two. We need to decide whether this will go to the male winner or the female winner, or if we will follow my idea of making the 2 winners dine together. We also face a health and safety dilemma, because the course is marked by a number of sturdy wooden bollards which would do a runner quite a mischief in the event of a collision. Fortunately for us, Dave’s wife Jane has come up with an ingenious solution to this problem, in the form of hi-viz bollard sleeves which she has designed and made. In fact, Dave and Jane are showing such organisational skills that we should perhaps put them in charge of our relay teams.

Slateman Triathlon (or Wetsuit for Sale)

Sunday 19th May, at 10:25am and I’m standing up to my knees in freezing cold water with my feet encased in an old pair of socks resting on some evil mixture of mud and rotting vegetation waiting for a horn to sound, wondering whatever induced me to come here.

In 2011 I foolishly got a desire to attempt a triathlon, followed by some others and culminating in the purchase of a second-hand wetsuit to attempt the open water swim in the Bideford Triathlon. Even on the hottest day of the year (in October) it wasn’t that warm in the water, but memory fades quite quickly, and after watching it on TV I decided that I could attempt the Slateman Triathlon in North Wales. I even stupidly ignored the fact that the swim that year, had been cut from 1000m to 750m due to the cold conditions, but last year was a poor year and it was going to be better this year, wasn't it? Well after a miserable, cold winter during which I hardly got out on the bike at all, I decided I wasn't fit enough to attempt the 60K bike course, so asked to be changed to the sprint event. (400m swim, 20K bike and 6K run). This seemed a lot more achievable. We booked B&B in Llandudno, ok it was a few miles from the race, but it was No 1 on a tripadvisor list, and was a very nice place. We got the last room available. So we were on the 4th floor, and there were 63 stairs down to the breakfast room in the basement!!

We spent Saturday driving round Anglesey as heavy rain had been forecast, but none actually appeared, went bird-watching (as we do), caught a brief glimpse of two puffins, and saw hundreds of razorbills etc. Then back to check the weather forecast and pack the equipment. But there seemed to be a problem, the weather was being forecast as dry and sunny – surely some mistake !! Anyway I packed various items of warm clothing in my box just in case. Up early the next morning for a bowl of cereal, our hosts had even offered to make us rolls in lieu of the cooked breakfast. And even after Richard had insisted on washing all the seagull droppings off the car we still arrived in good time. Set up in transition, ignored the safety briefing (oops, don’t tell the organiser), but I needed the loo and didn't want to use the wetsuit.

The main event started first with the fastest athletes going off at 9:30am, followed by three more waves at 10 minute intervals. Eventually it was time to force myself into the wetsuit and nervously wait for my turn to start at 10:30am. Well after all the practice swimming laps of the pool, I thought I would be OK. I’d even counted roughly how many strokes it would take, but I still couldn't get my face to go in the water, so ended up doing breast stroke with my head up again. I started off near the back, and hadn't gone very far when the competitor on my right raised his hand and needed to be rescued from the water. They have plenty of marshals in boats ready for this, and it did cross my mind for brief moment to do the same. But I plodded on, aware of the field pulling away in front of me, but with a glimpse of a few white hats nearby. Without my glasses, the hats and the red buoys for the turns was all I could see. Three hundred strokes later and the boat is alongside, and I can hear encouraging words, but still I can’t see, “left a bit”, “straight on”, “right a bit”, “just past the black buoy”. I can’t see it, so she guides me towards the finish, then I get cramp in my right leg, and can’t move it, so swim with just my left leg. Then my feet touch the mud, but I can’t stand up so paddle forward a bit more, then hop and paddle and finally I’m on dry land. Richard is there and unhooks the Velcro on the wetsuit zip, but I concentrate on just running up to the transition. It’s about 200 yards, and I can’t see much without my glasses, but I ran it yesterday so pretty sure I can find my bike. Then it’s off with the wetsuit, or rather it isn't as the old socks and the timing chip are all tangled together with the leg of the suit and it takes several attempts to extricate myself. (Which causes some amusement for the spectators just the other side of the barrier). Luckily all this effort seems to have brought some circulation back to my hands, and I get my red cycling jacket, shoes, helmet, and gloves on and set off on the bike.

By now the sun is starting to come out, and the course is only slightly undulating at the start. So I’m feeling much better already. However it’s not far before we’re starting the long incline up to the top of the Llanberis Pass. I’d heard this mentioned in hushed tones, so was suitably apprehensive and had carefully avoided driving anywhere near it. However it’s not that steep, there’s plenty of steeper hills round here, but it’s just relentless. About 4 miles just continuously going up. The road winds a bit so a line of cyclists can be seen ahead, some moving very slowly or even walking. Coming round one bend I hear the unmistakeable sound of a cuckoo, and I’m starting to pass quite a few of the cyclists. And then ahead it’s the top of the pass, people cheering and the joy of descending the other side is only slightly tempered by the thought of the climb back up on the return. Meanwhile a Llanberis Mountain Rescue vehicle has whizzed past, followed by other “blue-light” emergency vehicles. As I come down and round a bend I spot the reason, someone – I think it’s a motorcyclist, not a competitor, has had a nasty accident. A sobering moment, and I take it a bit more carefully on the bends. Turn left at a junction, turn in a lay-by and the sprint competitors go back the way they came. The casualty is still lying on the ground, but the face isn't covered so that’s a good sign. Back up to the top of the pass, not far this side, then it’s the long downhill back in to Llanberis village. I can see only one competitor in front and I’m keeping up with him. Then back into transition. My box is a mess, I can’t find my hat, and when I do the fastening has come undone, never mind, I perch it on top of my head, and I’m out on to the run. The sun is out and it’s becoming warm.

The track in the grassy field becomes a tarmac road and I slow down to adjust my hat, hearing a bystander laughingly saying “I thought it was a sprint”, his wife hits him and I continue up the steep hill. This rapidly becomes a rough track with plenty of stones, boulders and tree roots. I've passed a few runners and am now on my own. I’m reminded of bits of the Haytor, Race the Train, and anything on Exmoor. I convince myself I've done plenty that has been harder, but my legs are definitely starting to complain. Suddenly there are loads of competitors around and I realise the long course has joined the route, but they are much faster than me, and I obligingly let them past. It’s good to have someone to follow. We’re now going downhill and soon the trail is back on tarmac and then a gravelly track with a “400m to go” sign. Joy!!! This is so similar to the finish at the NDVM. I’m counting down paces, I suddenly hear Richard cheering me on, and there’s the finish, I've made it. I collect my slate coaster (what else ?), grab a handful of biscuits, chocolate etc and Richard’s there to meet me. And the sun is still shining.

The official review of the race is at http://alwaysaimhighevents.com/triathlons/latest-news And the results are at: http://www.tdl.ltd.uk/race-results.php?event=1331